Another day

Hi. It's almost 5 in the morning and i have been late night binge-watching the tv. I watched The Sixth Sense (I see dead people and shit), Afflicted (A docu-movie on how a guy turn into a non-sparkly Edward Cullen, quite nice actually, kinda like Chronicle the way they use video cameras) and a little bit of Dungeon and Dragons: The Book of Vile Darkness (Kinda like LotR, but with a bit of a budget cut, hahaha) and lastly Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (Do i need to tell you what it's about? The title is a little self-explanatory)

I love watching stuff on the tv, though i wonder why i hate sitting in front of my laptop to watch a movie, unless it's with friends. I guess i like the randomness of television as well as not needing to choose what i want/have to watch. I am born and raised to be acutely indecisive. Hahaha.

I have been planing on going for a jog for aeons. I have been couped up in my home for even longer. I need to get out on do something productive. Why not a guys day out? Wow, that would be awesome! *grunts and spits into a spittoon*

Hahaha. I'll ask the guys if they are free tomorrow or something. We are gonna have so much fun! *giggles girlishly*

In the meantime, i should get some sleep. Bye.

Dear God

Dear God,

I remembered once upon a time, a young boy lived happily in a free and happy world. He smiled at the simplest of pleasures. His remote controlled car, his jumbled up Lego set he kept in a bin, his room filled with glow-in-the-dark plastic stars, his drawings of mountains where the sun would rise at the middle of the valley in between. I remembered him well.

Now, he's all grown up. With experience that scared him, with fear that haunts him, with desires that tests his boundaries. He became something else altogether. I always thought he died somewhere in between all that. A car accident while he was trying to cross the street. Or he fell down the stairs and broke his neck. Maybe he did.

But something tells me that maybe, just maybe, that boy is still alive and kicking. Glimpses of him. His smile, his laughter, the way he loves to make people forget their lives for one moment and take the time to be happy. His love for all the things around him. He lingers on, like a memory of an old vacation you took with your family back when you were just 5 years old.

Do you remember him? Of course You do. I loved him too. But i guess we both can say for sure we haven't seen him around in a long time. But we can't always get what we want. We just take the cards You deal out and make the best of it.

You live a life, not knowing what would happen. Not knowing what lurks at the end of the street, both literally and figuratively. But when you get there, you are always in for a surprise.

You know, i truly don't hate You. To tell You the truth, i thought about it a few times. About wanting to hate You. About wanting to curse the heavens and basically becoming a blasphemous prick. But deep down, i knew i couldn't no matter what. How could you hate someone who always had your back even when you're not looking?

I guess I was right. That kid did survived the long journey down the road. He's out there, somewhere. Smiling his way up a new corner of a street. He loved You, even if he didn't understood that much at the time. I'm still thinking he still don't know much about You. But he trusted and believed in You. And You haven't proved him wrong.

So l guess I just have to go find him and make amends. He loves You, and so do I. For now, l guess that should be enough. Till then, I'll just stare at the ceiling, waiting for those stars to shine again.